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Better Dating Communication

SO, I went on this Bumble date on Friday night, after weeks of us talking.  We got a drink at one place... And yes, I paid for our drinks... Then we got a drink at a second place.

I texted her yesterday and haven't heard back.  I know I won't.  She ended the date with.. "Well, it was nice to meet you."

And that was that.  If they are interested they talk about let's meet again.  But if they are't they just say... it was nice!  Even though it wasn't nice.  Because if it was nice... You would be interested in meeting again.

Oh well.  We weren't compatible anyways... She's super into all the philly's sports teams and I'm just like oh, "Yeah, I don't watch sports."  And she was like... "I used to live in the city and it was AWESOME because I lived RIGHT next to the stadiums in South Philly so I could go ALL the time to see games."

And she was expecting me to be like... THAT'S AWESOME!  Instead I was like.. "Yeah, that seem's like it would have been nice."

SO when things are nice... It means.... the opposite in dating.

I feel like dating is weird and sugar coated and everyone says the opposite of what they mean.

I don't know, we need better communication.  We need to just be open and honest when we go on dates.  And just like say exactly what we're thinking and not be nice or hold back.  It's such a waste of money and time to think maybe someone is interested... If I knew from the first moment we met in person before we even went into the establishment and bought the drinks... It would just be like okay.  Let's not even waste our time.

For example when I walked up to meet her... I responded to her last text message as I was walking up to her, but I responded verbally.  She was looking down at her phone.  She brushed me off and was like oh no, I'm waiting for someone, sorry.  Not interested in talking.

And I was like ummm... "I'm the person you're waiting for."  She was like oh.  OH.  Sorry.  Yes.

I knew right there... She wasn't interested.

That's dating though.  It's lots of wasting time.  Wasting money.  Wasting text messages.  It's just a clusterfuck really.  It's a train wreck.  It's terrible.  It's awkward.  It sucks.

It just really stinks because all these posts on Facebook from all these friends of mine that USED to also be single for the longest time are ALL meeting people.  Even Daylight is all gaga over her significant other the last time I checked.

I don't know.  It just makes me literally question the point of my existence.  Do I really want to just live out the rest of my days... Hoping.  Waiting.  Getting shot down over and over again.

It's almost like what's the point of life?  I feel like just being single and getting older and older... There becomes less of a point of life.

I mean, I'm not suicidal by any means... But... What if I'm 40 or 50 and still single.  I'd never just off myself or blow my brains out.  I'd definitely just waste all my money on booze probably.  Just start buying everyone I know shit.  Just basically not really give a crap bout life anymore because dating would be COMPLETELY hopeless.  Who knows... Maybe the love of my life is around the bend.

But these girls on dating sites that I go on dates with certainly don't help self esteem.  And the fact that EVERYONE else is all fall in love and meeting someone just makes me feel like shit most days.  Like... What's the point of even logging into Facebook.  More like fuck that shit book.

I guess I just have to keep going out to as many events as I can.  I already go out a lot but I just have to keep going out more and hoping that she's just around the bend at one of these things.  It's hard though.  Most girls are like icebergs.  You have to try to pick away with this little tiny ice pick.  Trying to convince a girl that you're worth her time or effort is nearly impossible.

Most of them don't want to give you the time of day.  After all... There's a million other guys also trying to holler at her... SO who the heck are you and why should I even give you a second glance?

I don't know... I just hate it all.  It's just like what's the point.  Everyone else is falling hopelessly in love and I just keep going on these bad online dating site dates where the girls are super apathetic about the dates.

And I'm just like okay... Well... I mean, what exactly IS it that you want me to do to impress you? Because some of the guys that I see that seemed to be married or in relationships out at these events look like complete slobs.  One guy hadn't had a job in a year.  But he was with someone.

I don't get it.  I feel like there's no rhyme or reason to how a girl decides she wants to date a guy.  "Oh I want a guy with his shit together."  And then she's all of a sudden dating some guy that just sits at home all day and smokes up and can't even keep a job as a cook in a restaurant and he's had 8 different jobs that he's lost over the past year.

SO basically... the moral of the story is... Don't believe anything that any one says because they are all full of shit when it comes to dating.

Anyways it's just frustrating.  And I'm just like tired of the dating scene and being single and trying to find someone when everyone else seems to have had no problem meeting the love of their lives.  It's just like... I don't get why there isn't just ONE girl that's interested enough that we can make it all the way.

Oh well.  I guess she'll come along one day.  Who knows.  I sure as heck don't.  The only thing I know is that dating just sucks.  And going on first dates from dating sites and apps is just depressing.