BennyEast.Com/Blog The official blog of Kenny West

Turned Around

Tonight I didn't turn around.  I thought about it, but I didn't.  I almost did, but I didn't.

What would have happened if I did?  I mean, probably nothing.  Or just wasted time and energy really.

Okay, so I'm on break from work, Easter break.  I'm off from now until Tuesday morning.  I'll still remote in and do work.  Although my coworkers have a different philosophy on that, so I won't see or hear from them probably until Tuesday.  I used to be like that, but my thing is... Then I'd be totally stressed out on Tuesday when I got back.

I'd rather be in the know and prepared for what I'm walking into.  I'd rather keep my ear to the ground, than to sort through a whole bunch of emails and be like... WHOA!  WHATISGOINGONHERE!?!?!

So, instead, I'm remoted in right now and dealing with emails while I cook a sweet potato to go with my salad and salmon that I'm having for dinner.

There are already a few emails that came in right after work.

I plan to work on various things around home this weekend, and work on music, and book stuff, and mulch and landscape outside, and remote in, and go to yoga, and what have you.

My sister wanted me to drive down to VA... I don't know what planet she lives on, but I have stuff to do.  I guess she has a husband, so she lives on the planet where her husband does all the things I'm doing around my house, but around their house.  Anyways, I told her I'm using this break to catch up on my to-do lists which really makes me feel less stressed and feel good.

Driving down to visit her would stress me out more, not only would I have all the stuff I WANTED to accomplish, not done... I'd then have it all piled up even more when I got back...

It's weird, you know, most people love that stuff.  They love some big road trip to see family or friends, they love to get away, and forget about work and their own living space.

I guess I'm weird like that.  I love to use this time to do things that I don't normally have time to do.  My philosophy is this, its simple... Vacation and that sort of stuff is for when you have an empty plate.

I have the same view at work.  My coworker likes to just leave the office for lunch.  He stops at the end of the business day and that's that.  His view is whatever is done, is done... And if it's close to the end of the day on Friday... His famous quote when someone is at our door at the last minute with an issue on a Friday...

"You know what that problem sounds like to me?  That sounds like you have a Monday Problem."

My view is... You're done when your list is empty.

Vacation is for when your to-do list is empty.

It comes from how my mom raised us.  She would say... "You can do whatever... AFTER you finish all your homework."

So basically, we came home after school and did homework.  TV?  Games?  Whatever?  AFTER homework is done.

That's my philosophy.

Right now we have open tickets of unresolved issues.  So, I remote in and work on things after hours.  Right now I have a to-do list of things to do for my personal to-do.  So, I focus on that.

I know it sounds a little like I'm saying we should all be work-a-holics.  I mean, okay, so maybe leave some things on your plate... But it all depends on what queue size.

So, if you have maybe a handful of things?  That's understandable, you can't keep your plate of items to take care of 100 percent empty all the time.

But, if you have say, 500 things on your list, I think maybe it wouldn't hurt to stay home on a long weekend and work on those lists, or skip that vacation.

And that's what I'm doing.

It makes me happy to know that I'm here on my first night of a break from work, just being productive.

That's why I didn't turn around.  Who knows what would have happened if I turned around, maybe better things would have come from it... But what I do know is... I didn't turn around...

Instead of going to Conshy brewing company after yoga tonight, I went to the store and I bought items on my shopping list.

Instead of spending money on a few beers at Conshy brewing... I'm at home making dinner.  I spent that money at the store instead.  I thought about it though, I thought about going to have a couple beers to celebrate my first night of break, and unwind and relax.

Instead, I'm remoted in sorting things, and cooking dinner.

What would have happened if I had turned around?  Probably the following:

I would have had my first beer... 6 bucks + a tip... On an empty stomach.

I would have sat there talking to the bar tender.  Maybe would have tried to sit down next to a cute single someone... She would have gotten up halfway through my first beer.  Or it would have turned out she had a boyfriend already.

I would have probably gotten a little down on myself, which is what happens every time I try any sort of romantic endeavor and fail.  Additionally, the alcohol amplifies that effect.

I would have probably decided to have a second beer.

I would have had some guy and his friend start talking to me...  Then his friend and me and him would probably end up having a third beer as we're all now friends...

And additionally, whenever I do go to a bar and some dude or multiple dudes start talking to me, and I don't get why this is...

They basically are like the type of people who throw back 6 or 8 pints in a night, and it's a week night, and they have work the next day.

Seriously, I have like 3 and I'm wasted.  And I wake up with a hangover.

Anyways so they probably would have been like... YEAH DUDE, go for another one!  You're on break man, do it up!

I would have then spent upwards of 25 or 30 bucks on beer, and then on top of that, I would have gotten some kind of bar entree as well.  50 bucks right there.

I would have left the brewery going my way and them going theirs.  Since I'd be too tipsy to drive yet... I'd now have to walk around for an hour.  Now it's too late to go to the store and I'm also really tired.

Alcohol makes me sleepy.

Now I'm home late, and the cats haven't been fed.

I feed the cats.

Oh and by the way, when I got home tonight... The cats had basically no dryfood left!  SO, if I HAD turned around... The cats would have been SUPER hungry.

I feed the cats, I then stumble up to my bed.  I fall sleep with all the lights on.  I don't brush my teeth before going to bed.

Then, I wake up with a hangover, and then I don't get out of bed until late... I don't get any of my yard work and landscaping done.  I still have this work to get done for accounts for new students.  I don't work on music or books.

I feel stressed... and drained instead of refreshed and restored.

So, let's re-cap.

1. I don't meet a girl.
2. I blow 60 bucks at the bar on a booze and unhealthy bar food.
3. I waste 4 or 5 hours befriending dudes I'll never actually interact with ever again.
4. I don't get my grocery shopping done.
5. My cats starve.
6. I fall asleep with the lights on, waste electricity.
7. I possibly add to tooth decay and a future of a cavity at the dentist.
8. I wake up with a hang over.
9. Don't get landscaping done.
10. Feel drained and get even less done on my list.

So, I didn't turn around.

Could the love of my life be sitting at Conshy Brewing Company right now?  Yeah.  She could.  But from ALL the nights I went out looking for love I learned one thing...

You're probably not going to meet someone, and... Your to-do list will still be waiting, and you'll have even more things on it.

Maybe I'm just getting older and wiser and more responsible?  Who knows.  What I do know is... My younger self would have turned around... Sat down, had a beer...

And ended up coming home to some very hungry cats.

Instead I'm enjoying a home cooked meal, and about to put a second load of laundry in the washer.

Oh, that's another thing... So, I'd still have a laundry basket full of dirty clothes.

I just feel like my Tuesday morning self is going to be thanking my Wednesday night self for not turning my car around and going to have a beer.  And instead, sticking to my routine.  Oh, and ALSO... I just did dishes that I had in my sink.  Now I have a clear sink as well.  So, add that to the list too!

After I finish making dinner, I'll relax with some a show or movie on Netflix and work on some things on my laptop while I watch a show or a movie.

Productivity and happy cats = 1

Passing out without brushing my teeth after wasting money on a few beers leaving all the lights on and not getting a single item on my to-do list completed at all and forcing my cats to sit at home starving waiting for me to come home and feed them = 0