BennyEast.Com/Blog The official blog of Kenny West

21Oct/120

I’ve come to realize something

I've come to realize that relationships/marriage/all that stuff is just never going to happen for me.  There are so many better guys out there that any girl that might have any interest in me would just be better off with.  I can't see a girl actually saying to herself I choose THIS guy as the ONE I want to be with.  Seriously?  Me?  No.  There are SOOOOO many other guys that are just soooooooo much better.  I don't want a girl to have to settle for me.  I don't want a girl to have to deal with me.  I'm weird... I'm odd... I have a folding bike in my living room attached to a bike trainer that I use to work out with.  I wear hiking pants almost every day... I sleep with night lights.

Seriously... I'm not a catch.  I'm not anything.  No girl will ever be happy with me.  I've come to realize that marriage or even a relationship is just no longer in my future.  It's just never going to happen for me because any girl I would possibly be with would just always want to change me... they would always wish I was someone more "normal" or better... they would always wish I was the guy out there that they SHOULD be with.

It's just how it is.  I wish I could be a guy that a girl would actually want to call "her guy" but it's just never going to happen.  I try sooooooo hard and I've tried with sooooo many girls... and eventually they just lose interest.  Eventually they just decide we'll be better as friends... and then a few weeks or months or years later there is some other guy they find that works better.  I'm never the one that works.

It's just how it has always been and how it will always be.  I've come to realize I'm never going to be the "one" that any girl wants.

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